Top 5 ways to identify manipulation in a relationship ~ Billy Caputo
- HOME COURT ADVANTAGE
Your partner always insists on major events taking place in areas where they feel like they have the advantage. For example, they want you to move to their city or won’t give up their residence when it is time to move in together. The manipulator feels more dominate in their respective home court.
- LIMITS TIME TO MAKE DECISIONS
Your partner constantly pressures you to make important decisions with little time to process the information. By limiting your judgement, the manipulator gains the upper hand. While they’ve had ample amount of time to decide what they would like, they hope you welt under the pressure and agree to their original idea.
- CONTINUOUS CRITICISM
Often disguised as helpful suggestions, jokes, or sarcasm your partner continues to criticize many situations in your life. The manipulator continues to judge you in order to lower your self-esteem and to gain the superiority within the relationship. This tactic is also used to keep you wondering and off balance. By continuously attacking your figure, job, style, or even sense of humor the manipulator is in control. They are deciding what is right and what is wrong, while you are never sure what is acceptable. They never stop judging or adding suggestions no matter how hard you try to correct the “imperfections”, thus further instating their dominance.
- THE GUILT TRICK
Your partner makes you feel guilty for doing things because they don’t agree with your decision. By making you feel guilty for your everyday actions, they know you are more willing to listen and do as they say. For example, instead of addressing the real reason that they don’t want you to go out with your friends, they make you think that you are wrong for leaving them at home and choosing your friends over them. The manipulator has won the argument by making you feel as though you don’t love them as they do and you don’t work as hard in this relationship as they do.
- THEY MAKE YOU WANT THE SAME THINGS
Your partner starts to relentless make you change or put aside your wants/desires for theirs. The manipulator constantly suggests their viewpoint, their goals, and what excites them while ignoring what you truly enjoy doing. Their needs are being met far more than yours. They make you join certain organizations, go to certain outings, and becoming investing in certain activities that are mostly targeted for them. Manipulators hides their selfishness behind making you feel guilty for not attending and not being investing in “bettering” yourself. While in reality, they want to control you to set aside who you are to simply please themselves.