5 Types of Friends Who Play The Victim Card That Are Toxic To You ~ Billy Caputo
The easiest way of passing through life is by constantly playing the victim card.
The average individual will only play it occasionally, but there are those who play it so often that they themselves have begun to believe they are actual victims.
While there are countless individuals who have the right of dubbing themselves victims, there is an alarmingly greater amount taking advantage of victimization. The genius of it is these individuals make sure to be “victims” of situations you can never really prove to be false.
For example, how many of you have a friend who still uses a decade old injury as an excuse for never exercising? I have at least two.
Playing the victim in such a situation isn’t especially harmful – not to you, anyway. If anything, it’s sort of amusing.
There are those, however, who play other versions of the victim card; these individuals you must avoid at all costs.
Their moral compass is waterlogged and has stopped functioning quite some time ago. If you call one of these individuals a friend, then you need to stop and rethink the relationships you have in your life.
That friend who always has boyfriend or girlfriend issues.
You’d think they’d learn from their mistakes and either fix their issues or break things off and move on with their lives, but no. Instead, they fill your head with their problems.
They sound like a broken record, and the only thing you can do to bear it is to take them out into public to eat – so they stop talking for a bit – and drink – so you don’t hurt yourself.
Eventually, you have to stop and consider the possibility these people constantly have problems with their relationship because they enjoy having problems. Or at the very least, enjoy having something to complain about.
If you’re in a bad relationship because you choose to be in a bad relationship, then you’re not a victim. You’re a moron – big difference. You’re simply choosing to play the victim card, and by doing so, you are unnecessarily bringing negativity into your friends’ lives.
That friend who always has some issue.
Life is great because it always — and I mean always — gives us plenty to complain about. If it isn’t this, then it’s that. We never have a shortage of complaints to make, but it doesn’t mean we need to constantly be making them.
There’s always something to complain about because there is always something going wrong. There will be days when we complain about important things, like not getting the job we were going for or losing a loved one.
Yet, we also manage to complain about the trivial things, like not being able to find our keys or running out of toilet paper.
There is always something to complain about, but playing the victim doesn’t get you anywhere. There literally is no point of it other than tricking yourself into pointing the blame away from yourself and/or taking advantage of the sympathy of others – the prior is poisonous to oneself and the latter, poisonous to all those around you.
That friend who constantly humble brags.
“Had a rough day… my girlfriend kept me up all night, I overslept, I woke up in a hurry, my Ferrari almost ran out of gas, and because I was running so late, I almost didn’t close that multi-million dollar deal, which is why I’m so incredibly tired right now.”
If this is a friend of yours, then keep’em. He or she sounds like a whole lot of fun.
But if you have friends who play the victim card only to brag about their lives but don’t drive a Ferrari, then get new friends.
But in all seriousness, humble brags are actually rather aggressive. It’s a self-medicated ego boost administered by your imagined superiority to others. Your friend thinks he or she is better than you and wants to make sure you know it.
But… these friends don’t want you to know they know you know they believe themselves to be superior to you.
That friend who never manages to grow — but swears it’s not his or her fault.
They do nothing with their lives, but only because their current situation is out of their control. Have you ever heard such a load of crock before in your life? I have, but only because I used to spew this same exact garbage. But I grew out of it.
When we’re young and dumb, not realizing the control you could have over your life is understandable.
It shouldn’t be encouraged, but stupid is as stupid does, and when we’re young, we do a whole lot of stupid.
If you have friends who always manage to find some innovative excuse for why they can’t change their lives, why they can’t grow into the individuals they know they have the potential of becoming, then abandon them.
They will never stand on their own two feet if you keep accepting them as victims, and by sticking around, you’re only allowing yourself to be held back from your own potential.
Those friends who believe life failed them, when in reality they failed life.
Most people fail at life. It’s not what you want to hear, but it’s the reality of it.
Life is difficult for each and every one of us. Some most definitely have it more difficult than others, but as our thoughts and emotions are all relative, even the most trivial of things can cause us great pain.
It’s these individuals, the individuals who can’t realize they are being victimized by their own hands, who you need to stay as far away from as possible. Such individuals will grasp to hold onto you as they’re falling through quicksand, not caring you’re going to suffocate along with them.
These individuals almost always fail to realize they are the source of their demise — how could they not? They are fighting with someone they cannot see. If they could see themselves for the person they really are, they would stop immediately.
Alas, playing the victim card is their remedy of choice. They’re poisoning themselves, and they don’t even know it.